Everything I needed to know about coaching basketball…

So this story begins one week ago on Monday when one of the high school volunteers brought me the phone at the Boys and Girls Club. I looked at her with very confused eyes, sure she must too be confused about who she was supposed to give the phone to — because who would call me at the club?

Well, turns out she was not confused at all. On the phone was the head coach of the third and fourth grade girls basketball team I am assistant coaching. I discovered later he had attempted to call my cell phone first, but with no answer tried the club. He was calling to explain that practice for the evening was cancelled since there was the threat of ice on the roads (this is still odd to me, by the way). Thinking that was all, I thanked him for letting me know and got ready to go back to coloring with a seven-year-old. But, to my surprise, he had something else to tell me. He would not be able to make our game on Thursday. I would have to coach — alone.

At this piece of news I nervously chuckled and said that should be fine as long as he told me what I needed to do. Mind you — not only have I never coached anything in my life, but as a team we had only had one practice and one game since my return from Christmas break. I managed to grab myself a Post-It note and a pen and got ready to take notes. Everything I ever needed to know about coaching a third and fourth grade girls basketball team would have to fit on a three-inch square. At least what he felt I needed to know did.

As the time between Monday and our game on Thursday rolled by I tried to not think too much about what I would do. Granted, this was probably not the best coaching strategy, but we were playing the same team as the prior week (coincidentally the best team by far), so losing was unfortunately inevitable.

When 5 p.m. on Thursday finally came I decided my role would be to make sure the girls played even amounts of time and combat discouraged feelings no matter how ridiculous the score. I must have looked at least a little like a deer in headlights since Rick, the director of the club, offered to help me out. I welcomed it.

I didn’t call a single time out (mostly because I wasn’t sure when would be a good time for one). I have no clue what our final score was because the scorekeepers kindly reset it at half time so as not to overwhelm my team. In the end I think the girls and I are equally looking forward to the return of our real coach.

Assistant coach I can do; I am not a head coach.